Twi

Dear Celestia,
Since I arrived in Ponyville I've been well,
I've got so many stories and so little time to tell,
I've made a couple friends just like you had asked,
Although I must admit, facing a dragon's an easier task,
No, no, not you, Spike, you're all right,
Please excuse my hesitation, just keep taking dictations,
Anyway, Celestia, how have you been?
I haven't heard a thing from you since the tenth,
Oh, well, that's okay, you've got bigger fish to fry,
Delegating in your castle perched up in the sky,
It's a real big world, and a cloudless night,
OUt the window I see the full moon shining so bright,
I wonder what's up there?
But then again, I'm just a daydreaming imaginative albeit studious young mare,
I've digressed, that's enough for today, time for goodbye,
Sincerely, your most faithful student, Twi.


Dear Celestia,
I write to tell you things are going fine,
This is just what I was feeling at the time, just the thoughts in my mind,
I've learned so much about friendship no less,
And I have you to thank for it... I guess,
But I was thinking, and I hope this isn't too soon,
Why didn't you tell me it was your sister imprisoned on the moon?
You said the prophecy was false, but you knew, were you lying?
What else have you been hiding?
I don't mean to sound hostile, it's just curiousity,
I'm sure you have reasons for secrets that you've got to keep,
Oh well, other than that I'm doing okay,
Pinkie threw one of her crazy parties yesterday,
She learned to expect the best instead of assuming the worst,
And to prioritize one's friendships and their interests first,
Taken into consideration feelings deeply immersed,
And when those needs are unmet, all that's left is the hurt,
When friends are ignored, they become so cold,
But you wouldn't know that, you're never alone,
To you it must be "just whatever,"
By the way, it's been forever since you've written a letter,
Please give me an update, it's been so long,
Your faithful student only wants to know what's been going on.
Sincerely, Twi... P.S. it's gonna be great,
Seeing you at the Grand Galloping Gala, I can hardly wait!


Dear princess "Stand-around-ignoring-your-best-student,"
Greeting everypony in line and making me look stupid,
Oh yeah, that Discord guy? We got rid of that jerk,
Thanks for sending me and my friends to do your dirty work,
With the fate of Equestria in the balance, I mean really,
You could have dispatched the national guard instead of six fillies,
Whatever, I guess you see no merit to what our life is,
And pay no mind to Ponyville's financial crisis,
You could make it all vanish with a nod of your head,
But you turn your omnipotence on the selfish things instead,
I hate your self-indulgence, it's driving me insane,
I hate your magic powers and I hate your stupid mane,
I guess all I'm saying is that I'm too stressed out, you see,
I guess the role of "faithful student"'s not what I'm cut out to be,
So you know what I did? I went to visit Derpy Hooves,
And she gave me a bunch of pills I crushed up and then blew,
They're supposed to relieve stress,
But somehow I ended up in the library and there's a real mess,
And Spike's out cold on the floor... lemme think,
I must have slipped a few of those tabs in his drink, get it?
I've got enough energy left in me to finish this note,
And if I poke Spike's belly he'll exhale enough smoke,
To send this letter out, then I'll just close my eyes,
One last time I think I'll say goodbye,
Sincerely, Twi.


Dear Lauren,
You don't know me, but nonetheless let me begin,
I'm just another fan of the work that you've put in,
Just another internet geek swept up by the sensation,
But I must confess, FIM is truly amazing,
I hope you liked my derivitave work, I hope you ain't pissed
That I killed off Twilight and Spike -- I couldn't resist,
I'm a little bit afraid to say,
But if our world was like Equestria my mind might not have worked that way,
I'm sorry for having written such terrible things,
Maybe your world is just a safe haven to me,
If I were to be with you, I would be so content,
Never have to think bad thoughts or even vent,
I would abide by Twilight Sparkle's friendship lessons,
I could be a little pony in your collection,
You could dress me and groom me, put me on display,
Hold me tight and tell me it'll all be okay,
All I can say, is that I want you, I need you,
I love you, I'll do anything to please you,
I could be with you forever, we would never be alone,
I'd even steal Craig McCracken's skin and wear it as my own,
I'll hold my breath until I pass out once my face turns blue,
Whenever I eat something delicious I imagine that I'm tasting you,
I'll say it right now, and I know it sounds absurd,
One day we'll meet each other and be together, mark my words.
Forever yours, Berd.